i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
