omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
