with your own penis?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
