Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
