...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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