turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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