sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
