38 yer olds are good kisserssss
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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