pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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