Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
