I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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