My nipple is on Facebook.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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