stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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