Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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