There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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