I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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