whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
