I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Mom said you looked used
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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