She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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