She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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