Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
