We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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