I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
