Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
