If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize