The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
