This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize