... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
My dad just said "fuck circus"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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