Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
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I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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