who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize