OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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