please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
