Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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