Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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