Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
