Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
