But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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