his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Randomize
