it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Randomize
