I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
