I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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