Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
