you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
