something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
The feeling are messing with the penis
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
