i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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