Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Randomize