when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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