They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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