Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
