I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Randomize